My ex-boyfriend was very manipulative, psychologically and physically.
The long title of this post is something he said A LOT! It was his way of saying I’m not going to be around forever. He was always trying to extricate himself and, ultimately, he did – in very traumatic fashion. Ironically, something else he said a lot was “I’ll always be in your life.”
There are certain people who will want to leave their mark and from the things he repeatedly said, he tried to do that through other people. When we split, has father had been dead for almost 20 years, his mother almost 15 years. Couldn’t let them go.
His precious boyfriend had died about a year and a half before we met. Couldn’t let go.
His sister had died before his parents – couldn’t let go. His cousin before that. Couldn’t let go. Or should I say, wouldn’t.
Life is an endless series of choices. You’re choosing all the time. It’s all down to you. There were things I did while I was with my ex that I really should have said “No.” To, definitely. In my body and in my soul, I knew they were damaging for me but we can do crazy things to please other people.
The key is learning to listen. My ex told me who he was by what he repeatedly said, what he did and what he didn’t do.
And in a funny way, I think he will always be in my life, if only mentally every now and then. I’ve learnt a great deal of valuable lessons from him. I’m grateful for him and I wish him well. He and I were not meant to be forever but I will tell you this,
Always be true to yourself.