I want solid things.
I’ve occupied my time with many different distractions, flaky people, ambiguous projects, untoward intentions. I’ve questioned them and realised they’re not the way.
My ex was the most acute example of this. There was a structure to what we had (dysfunctional as it really was!), I had things to occupy my day with for him, the same time FaceTiming in the evening, sharing Wordle results and, occasionally, going out of London to sightsee.
But so many walls and so much confusion.
When I moved back to my hometown a couple of years ago, there was a chap I chatted with and, have to admit, I found him very attractive and, on many occasions, felt like he was flirting back with me. I don’t know what the truth is but there are too many crossed wires to ignore and that’s fizzled out.
It leaves me faced with what I need to do – my true path and it’s overwhelming and I’m impatient, ha ha! A frustrating combination but an opportunity.
I only want solid things, definitive plans, focused action.
And I am watching this space.