Month: October 2025

In needing to be right, you wind up looking like a prick. I can’t sugarcoat it.

The aim of life is to do good things for good reasons.

We know taxation is immoral but there are many resentful people in the world who rely on it and don’t want the gravy train to end. It’s not complicated and most people believe they should pay taxes (the price of living in a civilised society, blah blah) because they’ve been so persistently guilt-tripped into the belief.

Income tax was levied in Britain to fund the Napoleonic wars. There’s nought so permanent as a temporary government programme.

I’ve just been in my attic finding yet more useful things hidden between the rafters, had yet another satisfying clear-out, going back to solid foundations, able to move around more freely and more easily. That’s the goal.

You have to ask yourself what you’re basing your decisions on. Are you another angry man who believes in ‘wealth distribution’? Do you believe it’s just for elected officials to say what you can and can’t do? Are you desperately trying to cram every event into your worldview no matter how ham-fisted or clumsy it is?

The truth is we need each other. Countries are their people. We go mad when we don’t interact. We can be selective, yes but there is no point in arbitrarily alienating people by writing them off for a different point of view.

Believe me, I am still very much a work in progress on this front.

I am reading a book about creativity. It’s by Rich Rubin and I chose it because I found the cover (in fact the binding in its entirety), very attractive. Shock horror! 

We shouldn’t judge books by their covers, we’re told but we do! All the time. We find people attractive, the human equivalent of judging a tome by how it’s bound. We’re told it’s morally reprehensible to be so base, to be so surface-driven but we are.

You realise that people are full of judgement. They’re berating people and things all the time. I’ve seen a few tweets recently with pictures of fancy churches saying “the people who built these churches weren’t motivated by profits”, of course, we know this is bullshit.

People want to sound clever and lofty. They want, it appears, to be so disgusted to show their moral or intellectual superiority – over whatever subject. 

BUT!

They offer no solutions and admit they don’t have any. “You’re being genocided!” was the repeated cry of a podcast guest I started and fairly quickly stopped watching this morning. Don’t need it. 

The amount that people gripe says to me that there’s something about strife that people actually enjoy, they can’t get enough pessimism in their lives. You can see them getting animated by it. 

We’re creating realities for ourselves all the time and the guiding principles of our behaviour will inform what your world looks like.

Getting stuff done that actually helps people, that’s what I want and what I’m working for. All this talk of ‘that’s what the normies think and do’ is getting so old. All criticism and no creativity for solutions.

Create good stuff!

It feels like the world is imploding and falling down at the same time and in the second before you throw up, you realise it’s been…

All

Your

Fault!

I’ve been dry for 11 months today. 335 Days, which, funnily enough, is the number of the London flat I lived in for almost 22 years. I love synchronicities like that, of any kind in fact.

I’m glad for the decisions I’ve made. Many of them have been very difficult. It demonstrates to me I’m more resilient than I give myself credit for. I’ve added resilience to the list – in a recent conversation with my friend Riley, he posed the question “Who have I been the whole time?” (Part of a discussion on bettering ourselves and acknowledging who we are as men).

I’ve rephrased the question to “Who have I been the whole way through?” and I’ve already written a quite satisfying list, including ‘frightened’, because that’s been true.

Frightened of what people have thought.

Frightened of spending money.

Frightened to voice my own opinions calmly.

Frightened of not having all the answers.

I’m heading over to a village today, on the bus. It’s called Eyam. It’s famous for its church, its Hall (that I will be visiting) and the plague cottages. My sister went to Ballet lessons there as a child. She is a fabulous dancer. It’s a part of her. I’m a fabulous dancer too, it’s something I am reviving for myself.

Learn to accept who you are and where you are.

Learn to acknowledge your gifts and invest in them.

The only way to make progress is to accept the current situation first.

When there’s stuff to do, it’s really great to get it done.

It doesn’t have to be “big”.

No need for it to be pivotal.

What we’re talking about is being proactive, ceasing procrastination, taking ownership.

If there’s something you can do that completes a project, makes something more beautiful and you take the responsibility, that is brilliant!

Seriously.

A lady approached me in the café yesterday after seeing me interacting with the staff and in her deliciously delicate French accent told me “you have a lovely energy…it really matters.” And with that she left. It was a meaningful, heartwarming moment.

I’ve taken on the job of sweeping up the leaves at my apartment complex. People are grateful. I didn’t ask permission or check whether I should be doing it. I simply decided it was my job. And that’s all it takes.

Decide on what makes you feel alive, share it and do the world some good. Stop judging yourself and allow yourself to get on with YOUR life. It really can be that simple – and powerful!

I’m arranging for the plumber to come round, he’s actually removing a defunct gas fire.

He’s texted me this morning asking if he’s removing the fire surround, which he isn’t.

I was genuinely perplexed because he’s already been in the flat doing other work and has looked at the fireplace and taken instructions.

There’s too much going on, people’s brains are fried, we’ve taken on too much.

Focus.

Simplicity.

These are what to focus on.

Comparing ourselves, all the time!

Someone’s outworking you, someone’s working harder than you, someone’s winning the competition.

Okey doke then. Acknowledged, what do we do?

Well, we look inwards.

There is nothing we can do about who’s out there, doing whatever.

We have our paths, my friend, our ways of doing things, our way of accepting we’re at the stage we’re at.

Now, I can’t tell just how much more progress I’ve made by slowing down the approach – being present with what’s going on, relaxing more, understanding the purpose of the end of each day is to say “that was a good one.”

It’s personal.

Your personal path.

Your personal progress.

Your personal transformation.

Keep going, keep believing in you, all you can do.

I’ve just seen a very famous artist, known for his hard-hitting portrayals during the Covid/Lockdown era, leave an incredibly scathing remark on an AI image. I particularly struck me as the picture in question was a far more sympathetic rendition than most and quite attractive in fact.

I debated replying to his comment but didn’t bother because I don’t want to contribute to the increasing trend of various figures demanding absolute purity that just isn’t possible in the real world.

The thing with great artists, like gold as a commodity for instance, is intrinsically because of their rarity. Most people do not have the gift of producing their own art. The question I was considering posing to this gentleman was whether they should be sharing his art or another’s unique work? Maybe that’s his position. I don’t know and I’m starting to not care because it’s all about the argument.

The funny thing is, I wouldn’t have seen this particular AI-image had this chap not commented on it. Irony dictates that people draw attention to these apparent evils thus giving them more reach than not.

Hatred begets hatred.

Good begets good.

And there’s no doubt that things are inverted in our time – people believe anger is a good thing and they should be angry more not less. 

Anger is a signal to improve things, to stop denying reality, to make things better and resolve the anger, thus rendering it obsolete. Not create more anger.

Those that want more unity, in their efforts, seem to create and desire more discord. If you don’t do what I do, you’re wrong – therein lies the tyrannical instinct people don’t want to admit.

Long story short drop the pomposity, it’s ugly and will never wake people up.

I am not what you would call ‘a reader’ but in recent weeks, I have taken up reading each night before bed. It’s profoundly uplifting reading the wisdom of people I admire, for several reasons.

Now, I have known ‘readers’ – people who read books in days, will sit down on holiday in foreign countries and just read all day. Total immersion.

But last night I paused partway through a chapter and thought about these people and the common denominator of all of them was the sheer speed they would go through pages and chapters!

Yeah, they didn’t ‘read’ those books, they simply wanted the accolade of “I read that before everyone else.” – “I’ve already read that.” – “Oh, I read that ages ago! Haven’t you read it yet?!” Ugh! Ego. Lots of ego.

I remember watching a school friend read a book, ‘reading’ two pages, I kid you not, in about 10-15 seconds. I remember being totally perplexed, astonished, by her. “Oh yes, I read really quickly.” Nope! 

It’s disrespectful and I’ll tell you why. Think of the amount of effort that goes into writing just one book, I wonder if you’ve ever thought about it. 

The sheer commitment to writing one book is something the vast majority never do, let alone multiple tomes. The pains and frustrations that authors go through to elucidate and express their thoughts and you’re ‘speed’ reading or ‘diagonal’ reading?! Rude and not real.

As I read each word clearly last night, I felt a profound sense of adulthood and gratitude. No hurry, no rush, just me with the author’s work, a true meeting of minds, forged over decades, wonderful! 

That’s how we should be doing things – calmly, respectfully, acknowledging the efforts and genius of people who have created things for our benefit. 

I learn to acknowledge these things more and more, we are surrounded by extraordinary people all the time – when we switch on the lights, when we wander along pavements, when we boil water in a pan, things people have figured out for us and we don’t even know their names.

Something to really think about and incorporate into your life.

We want to be involved.

We want the attention.

We want the notoriety.

Goodness we experience any FOMO! It’s such a prison as it’s relentless. The more you stop and observe, the more you’ll realise people thrive on getting a hard-on for the anger!

I had a Google Meet last night with two great friends, whenever I talk with them, I am reminded about choices – what I let in and what I keep out. Boundaries, they’re important and what really resonated yesterday during the conversation was WHY they are important.

It’s easy to draw a line saying, I need this particular time on my own, for example but why is it important? Clarity of thought, peacefulness, people interfering is upsetting to me, etc. etc.

Feelings. They are anchors in the body and we should absolutely learn to the trust them, they are ancient and they’re signposts to good places, to keep us on track.

Decide what You want.

What is your purpose?

What is your mission?

What is your calling?

What is your vision?

Now, this isn’t exactly a political post.

We can agree that an adult is someone who stands on their own two feet. People are going to do what they’re going to do, they believe what they believe, the point is not trying to convince everyone. It never happens that we all agree and, in fact, it doesn’t matter.

If you have any degree of awareness, it will be easy to get annoyed when people actively vote for their own destruction. 

I got into a sort of discussion about politics with a stranger the other day and, not surprisingly, he said we haven’t tried real socialism, going as far as saying communism hasn’t be done properly.

We need something ‘new’ he said. I asked him, reading between the Ines, “how much should we tax people then?” Of course, he wouldn’t answer because, so fuelled by resentment, he doesn’t want anybody owning anything. He believes money should go to ‘government’ and not be passed from parent to child.

We shook hands and parted ways, fortunately there was a bus waiting to take me home. It’s nice to actually see certain things working. New, competitive bus companies stood in recently for a shit firm that went bust. It was quite a smooth transition.

There is good stuff but if you’re online for any amount of time, it’s going to feel especially grim being reminded you’re not being listened to. 

People will fight and fight about Brexit as a) it was such a momentous victory against the machine but also b) the powers that be always need something to blame their failures on, even if said thing, Brexit in this case, hasn’t happened.

I don’t mind saying I voted for Brexit because it was for the spirit of the movement, the expression of the desire. Some say I’m naive or a normie for this belief, absolutely fine, up to them.

Most will say fight for your rights, I say stand up for them. You never know what a resilient mindset will do to show people what’s possible.

Other people will people.

Other humans will human.

Will civilisation be civil? Hmmmm!

We’re looking to others for the answers.

We have an inbuilt need to be told what to do, how to behave, what’s right and wrong. Always deferring our responsibility to the desires and whims of others.

We don’t realise how dangerously we live.

We live under a veneer, an illusion, of steadiness defined by others – often so far removed from our lives that even if they did care, they would not have any influence at all to improve our lot.

No, what you do, what you alone do, is what counts.

It’s not someone else’s job.

Always remember this when you’re looking for answers.

We’re faced with competition all the time.

Politics

Religion

How relationships should work.

We want our ‘side’ to win because we either just want to be right or we believe it would benefit the greatest amount of people.

But lost in the fight of it all, desperately needing to have the upper hand, have you stopped to think, do I actually improve my life getting lost in the argument?

Do we believe that our efforts will effectively change anyone’s mind?

I see many frantically trying to disprove events but in the same breath saying how unimportant said fashionable issue is. I’m finding it increasingly vulgar frankly. The pomposity I witness in people taking the moral high-ground is so off-putting.

How intently are you questioning things purely to find out the truth?

z§We like to think we’re sovereign, independent beings but we can’t deny how much we like to delegate jobs and responsibilities to other people.

I’ve just seen a two minute clip on Twitter of a man complaining about the state of a newly built bridge with weeds and even a tree growing from the bridge soon to cause damage.

OHHHHHHH! ‘They’ should be doing that! It’s a disgrace!

Well, yes, if you believe that paying your taxes like a good little boy is to fund local services. You might have noticed that your government is always at war with other governments. Funny isn’t it?

“We’re at war!” We contradict ourselves even saying it. Are we on the frontline? Do we want to bomb total strangers thousands of miles away? Are our limbs being blown off into smithereens on the battlefield? Nope!

If taxation were voluntary and someone came round asking for a donation to detonate explosives on innocent people on different landmasses, would you give? No. You wouldn’t.

Always someone else’s job.

I heard a story of village life fairly recently. He claimed a stretch of the high street by the church. He tended in particular to a certain road sign that was easily covered by surrounding plant life and ensured the sign was visible to make life easier. It was mentioned in his obituary the contribution he made.

When I’m out I pick up litter, part of it out of a commitment to beauty, the other that I see it as my job. How can I criticise others for NOT doing it when I’m not doing it either.

Responsibility

Ownership

Integrity

It’s your job.

Your job to make things better.

Your job to tend a section of street.

Your job to relentlessly contact the people to get the ‘proper’ people to do their jobs.

Don’t fall for the falsehood that people want honesty.

When push comes to shove, they want you agreeing, they don’t like being challenged.

Honesty is a mirror.

Honesty says “You said this, I say it back and then we fight.” This tends to be the rule.

I say this on the back of being accused of ‘snark’ in doing the above.

Legitimacy is a threat to many, it assumes accountability.

Never assume that being honest will make you loads of friends. And yes, I am aware of how black-pilled this sounds but I think many of us are discovering just how much we’ve been walking around on egg shells to keep friends or at least ‘buttoning our lips’ when it comes to sharing honest and reasonable points of view.

It really matters to me the definitions of things. I realise my Philosophy degree wasn’t a consolation prize or a last resort, it was absolutely the right thing for me to do – because I’m a genuine thinker.

I’m never surface-level about anything. I think deeply, I reflect deeply and yeah – I do ‘that’ deeply too.

I want to understand the point of things and I am relentlessly looking for answers in various ways.

Want to know the best way to find out? Do things. Get to the point rather than skating around issue after issue.

I have very little patience for fannying around these days, I want honest and I’ve also learned the best way to do that is to ask serious questions calmly.

Don’t flap. Get to the point – be direct, be genuinely interested. You’ll get what you want that way as people will take you seriously – because you’ll be taking yourself seriously.

Oooh my goodness, doing therapy unblocks a lot of drains and the shit’s got to get flushed one way or another.

I think my posts have been a bit of the darker variety recently but let’s call it Autumn Cleaning rather than Spring, I like to be accurate.

You have to be really sure of the direction you’re going in as once you decide, it can be very easy to get stuck.

Back, with all faith and commitment, one political grandee and you’ll find that if you utter one bad word about him, that’s half of your following hate-abandoning ship and then back whoever-it-is’s backer, there’s the other half gone too.

Principles, that’s what I like. Honesty being one of them.

New information, new declarations and a radical change of position when it’s necessary.

Live not by lies, don’t get trapped, live truthfully.

I thought a subtle title was suitable today.

I’ve been temporarily sucked in by political posts on Twitter the last few days, LOL.

Forgive Me Lord, for I have sinned! It’s a swamp, genuinely.

The amazing thing though that one sees is just how many idealistic, programmed beliefs still have about politics, culture, there’s so much rose-tinted glasses behaviour that still holds.

Trade Unions used to represent the common man but don’t now – nope, never have, all based on resentment.

Politicians used to be conviction based, again, no, not really.

Christianity says put not your faith in false idols. It’s very good advice but when you get entwined online or have a ‘family member’ generations back, it can extra hard to ignore the brainwashing that’s been prevalent from the beginning.

It’s all so subtle and subliminal.

We want to believe it because it feels like an anchor in the squall, a lighthouse in the storm but history tells us over and over, that the institutions are not on our side.

Eyes wide.

Ears open.

Heart incorruptible.

That’s the way. You have to be very brave to admit that what most belief is a dream at best and deception at the very worst.

There’s a really sweet lad I follow on Twitter, we follow each other in fact and he’s very supportive of my work.

He tweeted something the other day, something I see a lot that inspired this post.

They say that the best revenge to your doubters is to be successful. This is a passive stance. There is a need to motivate oneself outside of oneself. It’s always about proving people wrong, it’s always about overcoming objections. It’s not the way I do things.

I am fundamentally inspired by a need for goodness, vengeance of any kind is a poison to the system. You can’t feel resentment and be good. You can’t feel anger and be good, it’s always a submissive position.

Do the right things for the right reasons.

I saw a short video clip on Twitter yesterday. There’s a very famous soap opera in the UK (the longest running) called Coronation Street (known as Corrie). The clip was of four men sat around in the pub basically saying how much they were struggling in life and they came to an agreement that if they needed any help, they would share it amongst each other.

Now, of course, everyone was saying it was gay and cringe but, truth be told, I was expecting the clip to be embarrassingly unwatchable but I was, in fact, rather touched by the clip and thought to myself ‘if only most people realised what many men are actually going through.’ Would men even admit their struggles?

Doubtful, especially given the outpouring of scorn they’d get for owning up what was ‘going on inside’.

No matter how awake or down the rabbit hole people go, there are accepted norms of how we ‘should’ behave. What we should like and what we should ridicule.

The truth is I know there are many, many men like me who do so-called masculine things (work, do gym workouts, etc.) but we also have great depth of feeling that we want to sort through. We ARE sensitive and we don’t necessarily see it as a bad thing, we also don’t want to let our worries and anxieties ruin our lives.

It’s a balance but, honestly, I quite liked the clip. I found it comforting.

Sounds like a great idea ❤️#Corrie pic.twitter.com/UShM7Rxday

— Coronation Street (@itvcorrie) October 6, 2025

Without the noise, what do you think of yourself?

Without worrying about what you think people want of you, how would you behave?

Would you start to act in your own best interest?

What would you actually really like to do? How would you like to do it? Who would you like to work with?

With so much panic and frantic activity, are you actually conscious and living your own life or simply being reactive?

Who are YOU?

What is YOUR mission?

Are you actually living your own life?

I tweeted yesterday “A reminder that celebrations are one day, not entire months. This month, Halloween falls on 31st October, that’s it.”

We can’t wait anymore.

People will say the trouble with delayed gratification is that it takes too long.

People will start posting pictures of pumpkins on the 1st October, they will post Christmas pictures in November (or even earlier).

There’s a race about it, also a wishing away of life. 

We cannot sit still.

We won’t smell the roses.

We cannot steady ourselves out of guilt or whatever.

Always, always, always got to be doing something. Frantic!

And I’ve seen so much hustle-bro mentality. They always end up getting ill then comes the crash of the high-low cycle. 

Remember the tale of the tortoise and the hare, it has actually been replicated in ‘real life’ – there’s a lesson in. Time we listen.

In the Age of Attention, He who shouts loudest wins. Often it doesn’t even matter is he is right or wrong, He’s just the most heard and He’s converting the likes and retweets for money a lot of the time.

Not much substance to it though.

I’m not bothered about being famous, I’ve actually experienced it to some degree and it means you have no privacy, everyone wants something out of you but rarely returns the favour.

They’re so often trying to prove some kind of point, make sure what they need to say lands and then they’re gone. That’s happened a lot to me too because I haven’t stood up for myself or because I’ve perpetuated situationships for too long when I could have just walked away.

I find most conversations tiresome these days as it’s frequently being talked at rather than spoken with.

It’s why I’m curating my life to make sure the relationships I’m in work for me as well as the other person – Win-Win!

At various stages of my life, I’ve doubted my sanity, wondered if I am totally mad. I know, of course, that there’s nothing wrong with me, many have asked me “how do you know that?”

Observation

Immersion

Curiosity

I remember working in the centre of London and people would call to ask for directions to the office I worked in and my colleague would often remark “how do you know the street names, Martin? I have no idea.”

Well, I went out for walks at lunch time. Wherever I am, I like to be there, not letting the world pass me by. And also, wherever I am, I love to do things that are relevant to that place – walking around the countryside of my birth as an adult is an incredible privilege, it invigorates me!

To me, intelligence is about making connections – connections that the majority fail to see. It means I can predict things that others can’t, it means being misunderstood and, with many, resented. I’ve experienced this a lot! It’s why now I am physically and psychologically isolated. Have been for a long time in fact. Increasingly, however, I see this as a necessary stage of my development. I’m embracing it.

People will think what they’ll think – I don’t believe in forcing my views on people or hoping they will believe/act in a way that suits me, if I want particular treatment, I ask for it, that’s the only way.

It’s very much a watch this space stance I’m taking, dealing with things as they arise but going into every situation standing up for myself.

We live under several states of programming. One of them is linear time.

Wouldn’t it be so convenient that we had a clear, neat and totally objective view of history? This happened then that happened, which caused this to occur, which lead to the next valid stage. No, no, no. Sorry. Can’t do it.

We want a clear-line progression, simple, unambiguous but we know it’s a pipe-dream.

When we require, or even just request, that patience be baked into the mix, we react like children – I want it NOW! Immediately if not sooner! But you miss the point.

In rushing around, in being in such a frantic hurry, we miss the special, the rare, the subtle. Wolfing food down, not tasting every flavour, seeing it only as fuel, it abandons the spiritual state of life and shuns the opportunity to be grateful.

To me, peacefulness is not just a state but, increasingly, an approach. I find myself racing when out on my walks, sometimes I slow the pace, sometimes, I radically stop and take in my surroundings. I smell the aromas, I admire tree branches, gaze fondly at clouds, appreciate the bird song, the rustling of leaves as badgers and squirrels rummage through the undergrowth.

There are a million details at every step and we miss them – and it’s a chance to appreciate beauty as well as be inspired.

We live in an incredible world.

Slowing down, not seeing time as a line but as many circles bouncing off each other and us at the centre enjoying the interconnectedness of it all is a privilege we have access to.

Wanna take a ride?

Oh the ego wants excuses!

It’s not possible there’s a positive here, there’s no advantage there! Much easier to be hard-done-by than a responsible adult!

Believe me, I am not standing here saying I am perfectly autonomous, that I am wholly without procrastination or doubt. No, no.

I’m just as fucked up as the next chap, maybe more so, maybe less. I don’t know.

I’m figuring things out as I go.

I was inspired for this post by a mutual follower commenting on a doctor whose circumstances were greatly affected by speaking out during ‘COVID’. Regrettable, maybe yes but it occurred to me, yeah, he does get hero status though. 

Perhaps the hardships are worthy of an elevated position in this world?