Getting involved in Twitter, you really see human nature.
I’ll be honest, I’m absolutely astounded.
Maybe they’re copying from a cheat sheet or a manual they’ve got from someone or maybe it’s genuine. The amount of questions like,
“If you could go back 10 years, what would you do differently?”
“If you’re still doing XYZ, you’re not in pain enough.”
“What’s one mistake you wish you could change?”
There’s being honest about your shortcomings but then there’s plain beating yourself up.
If the process is too painful, you will stop. I’ve seen it happen so many times.
Whatever you do, you only know what you know at the time you do it and, let’s face it, we are all hideously conditioned from birth. Yes, some more than others, but no one is immune.
What is conditioning you ask? Great question.
Conditioning is what you take to be true (even though it’s usually wildly false!) from what you perceive as an authority figure – a parent, any family member actually, teachers at school, employers, doctors, accountants, you get the idea.
Conditioning is an interesting social adaptation because we all want to be liked and we want to be seen as involved and fitting in so asking questions, basically, about how much pain you’re in, helps you be part of the pack because it’s clear to me that the majority don’t feel great about themselves, they feel really, really shitty!
Overcoming beliefs that aren’t yours that you’ve acquired is an extensive process and unlearning what isn’t true can feel like you’re casting yourself completely adrift for no good reason.
But there is a good reason.
You get to start being yourself, understanding that you behaved in the past for very valid reasons, you only knew what you knew then and, ultimately, when you embarked on your voyage of self-discovery, everything that happened NEEDED to, to bring you to where you are now, helping you feel better about yourself, be more peaceful and able to trust yourself more.
It’s all a shift from things happening TO you, to things happening FOR you.
Don’t hate yourself.
Value yourself.